of giving out. But as usual, you are too selfish to give me what I
need. I hate to think of you in the light that others have cast on
you. Yet, at some point I have to realize they can't all be wrong. As
Daddy would say, everybody was't at the crazy house while you were
away at college. I was holding out hope mostly for myself, b/c I
didn't want to be stupid. I wanted everyone to be wrong b/c they
don't know you like I do. I still find it hard to believe that you are
this person. I'm guessing that I'm the only one that is surprised. All
I ever asked of you was the truth. But that seems to be the equivalent
of multi-million dollar settlement to you. I always thought of you as
kind and good, but now I feel like you really are pretty fucked up.
Not because of what you do, but b/c you won't hold yourself
accountable for what you do. And just to be clear, this is what your
refusal to man up meant to me. Not only did you not have any honorable
intentions toward me when I was seeing you, but you haven't used me
enough in your mind, so you want to leave the door opened for more
fuckery. It also means that you are sowing some seeds that will reap a
not so pretty fold b/c your heart behind your actions is full of
deceit solely for the purpose of getting what you want. News flash
Buddy, your sex alone is not that great, as I mentioned after the
first time. It is the emotions that you falsely solicit that make it
something noteworthy. And that to me is why I will look at you in a
new light from this day forward. Because you don't just want to screw,
you want to feel loved. But the problem is you're too afraid to love
in return. I will continue to pray for you, because you so desperately
need it. Stop being a selfish asshole and deal with your issues. You
really are hurting people and I know you don't want that to come back
on you. Emotionally you couldn't take what you are so fond of giving
out.
Day 1
Sent from my iPhone
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