Your actions are speaking so loud I can't hear what your saying!!!!

I'm so grateful for this blog right now, because it is keeping me from being crazy stalker girl. Well the lesson learned is I have to monitor myself for listening to words that don't match actions. I can't lie, I was almost sucked in on two fronts this week. But thank God, I have this hatred of being made to look like a dumb a$$. Honestly, I believed him for more than a day and I had actually started feeling sorry for him. But one thing H1 left me with was to never let a man talk when you know he has lied, because if you have any emotional connection you will let him suck you back in. I have to keep it 100 and admit that it hurts that the one that you married, supported financially/emotionally and made you compromise practically every relationship standard you ever held for yourself doesn't even respect you enough to not talk to women on the cell phone that you are paying for for hours on end in the wee hours of the night when you have full access to review his account information. Hell, I guess it shouldn't be surprising since he had no problem choking, slapping and manhandling me. That's the biggest disrespect. This actually pales in comparison. Yet I was holding out hope that maybe he did really love me and was going to change to win me back. So much for that theory.

And the cute boy has already crashed and burned into the abyss of being a liar for no reason. It could have been an ideal friends w/benefits arrangement. Unfortunately, for the lady with the mostly impotent and sexually unimaginative soon to be ex-hubby this will never be. I totally fault myself for taking him seriously initially. That just goes to show that I am still a hopeless romantic and I do believe that people "fall" in love. I'm glad to know that I haven't morphed into a bitter man hater. Thank God I'm moving, and I can leave both of the lying degenerates behind pretty seamlessly. Of course there is the exchange of P2 from time to time. But by and large, I am out of the woods on any real emotional dealings. I think I may shed one last tear and then its a WRAP!