The crazy lady and the sexting, oh my!

The crazy lady within was just stopped in her tracks. I had to erase his number from my phone to keep her from doing the unthinkable. She's not mad though, which is probably why I was able to keep her contained so easily without so much as a fight. Ok, what have I learned from this.......

1) He's just not that in to you. (Which I think I already knew)
2) You aren't really the booty call type. (Which is ok, because the lack of sex was clearly making you rethink this)
3) Your time will come. (It will be worth the wait.)
4) Clearly, I shouldn't have unlimited text messaging, because of the following:

Confession..... I sexted him a message. Ok, since were being overtly honest here, I did it on 4 different occasions. It was strangely exhilarating. But of course in retrospect, I don't want him having those pics of me forever. In fact, I don't want him having them at all. This is what snapped me back into adult reality. You know when you hear real adults telling their teens "That picture will be all over the internet and there is nothing you can do about it." I don't think he's smart enough to post it on the internet. However, I just hate that he can say I did it. My closet freak got the best of me. She and the crazy lady are starting to get just a tad out of hand. But that is a whole other post.

And I hate starting over. I just need a benchwarmer until the my first round draft pick comes along.

What is a girl to do???? Or is this the warning sign that I need another friend to take this journey with? The problem is he already knows me biblically.

DEALBREAKER even if you're not in a 'relationship'??? That is my delimma. What am I willing to accept. It doesn't help that my panties get wet when I see him.

But he won't give that to me. And with that damn accent, I can't understand half of what he is saying anyway. So now the question becomes is dishonesty a

I mean, i'm no angel I have cheated and I have been the dreaded other women. But the all the cards were on the table and adults can make there own decisions.

For this arrangement to work there must be complete transparency and total honesty. I'm a big girl, I can handle just about anything that I am aware of up front

for anything serious right now. But my candidate is playing this game as if he has to act like it could be more and that is screwing everything up.

I'm sitting here contemplaiting wether I'm really capable of being in a friends with benefits situation. It seems so simple, considering I'm not ready

I finished my last final and now I can have a moment to breathe for just a fraction of a second.

I have been living a sequence of days that I will look back and laugh on at some point. The sooner the better, so I will start laughing now.